I'll Wait for You
by PacificTwist
Summary: Karen has given up on everybody in Flowerbud Village and has finally left to the city, but soon tradegy strikes and she is forced to move back to the place she once called home. She in reunited with her old love, but does he still feel the same about her
1. I'll Wait for You

**Title: **I'll Wait for You 

**Genre:** Tradegy and Romance

**Catagory:** Harvest Moon

**Summary:** Karen has given up on everybody in Flowerbud Village and has finally left to the city, but soon tradegy happens and she is forced to move back to the place she once called home. She in reunited with her old love, but does he still feel the same about her?

**Disclaimer:** I DO NOT OWN HARVEST MOON OR IT'S CHARACTERS, BUT THIS IS MY ORIGINAL PLOT LINE AND STORY!

* * *

**Chapter 1: I'll Wait for You **

"I'll wait for you," were the last words that he ever said to me, as I loaded my things onto the ferry. The dark waters shook the boat from side to side as I looked over the railing at the only person that I ever cared about. The rain came down on my head, and my damp hair blew in the ocean breeze.

As the boat pulled away from the dock, I still had second thoughts about leaving, but I knew I would never be happy here. This place had never been kind to me, my parents had never cared, and I never had many friends. I had grown up in a home without love, and in result I became very violent toward everyone... until he came.

-----------------------------------_Flashback_--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I still remember that day, working out in the vineyard, just hoping that for once there would be a good harvest. As I pulled the grapes from the dieing vine, I heard my father call in the distance.

"KAREN!! Get over here, the new farmhand is here," He yelled, the tone that I had grown up with. I grabbed the basket of grapes and ran through the rows of vines. It was dark out, and the leaves lay scattered all over the ground. I could see my house lights in the clearing. As I exited the vineyard I saw him. A young man around the age of 16 stood next to the house conversing with my father.

"Karen... this is Kai. He will be staying with us for a while to help out with the vineyard," My father said as I approached them. The boy turned toward me. He wore a purple bandana, almost the same color as my vest. I stared at him, but gave him no thought.

"Nice to meet you," I shrugged as I turned back toward the vineyard. He was quite good looking... but truthfully I really didn't care. I was never very enthralled with the guys that lived in this hell hole called home.

"Karen!" My father screamed, "He is our guest... so treat him like one.

"Fine..." I replied. "Follow me," I said to the boy. He picked up his bags and followed me into the house. Inside, my mother Sasha, sat on her rocking chair, knitting another useless piece of clothing.

"Hello... mother," I said with my normal stubborn voice. "This is the new farmhand... not like you care though" I said under my breath. My mother didn't even look up from her knitting; she just flicked her wrist and sighed. She never showed any emotion other than her normal sullen self... but I knew it wasn't her fault. She suffered from manic depression, and my abusive father never made anything better.

I led Kai up the stairs and opened one of the 3 doors in the tiny hallway. It was still dark inside so I flicked on the light switch. Inside there was only a bed and a small dresser.

"This is the guest bedroom, it is where you will be staying," I told him. "If you need anything, my bedroom is right next door."

"Thank you very much... I'm sure this will be just fine," He said to me. He had a very pleasant voice, it was quite soothing. I left him alone in the room and walked back down into the living room with my mother. My father walked in from outside and headed into the kitchen. We never talked, which was probably for the better.

"Karen dear, can you get me a glass of water," My mother said, once again not even looking up at me. I didn't even need to answer. I walked into the kitchen and opened the cabinet with all the glasses in it, but when I opened it and glass fell from the shelf and shattered all over the floor.

"You STUPID girl!" My father screamed.

"It's fine dad... I'll pick it up," I said, hurrying to pick up the broken glass before anything bad happened.

"NO... it's not fine. You can't do anything right. You were a big mistake," he yelled, and at that he threw out his arm and smacked my upside the face with the back of his hand. I couldn't take it anymore, and I ran out of the house.

I ran through the rows of vines and collapsed onto the ground in tears. The tears streamed out of my eyes onto the dry ground. As I lay there I heard footsteps approaching behind me.

"Don't touch me!" I screamed, not turning around to face him.

"I'm not going to hurt you," a gentle voice said to my surprise. I quickly turned around and wiped the tears from my eyes. Above me stood Kai, holding out his hand to help me up.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as I took his hand.

"I heard what happened, are you okay?" He asked me wiping a tear from my eye. I turned my head and quickly replied that I was fine.

"You know, you can't let him do that to you," He said.

"I know... but what am I suppose to do. There is no one that can help me. Nobody cares enough about me to stop him from doing this. I have no one to turn to," I cried out and collapsed onto the ground again at Kai's feet. He kneeled down and took my hand in his.

"I'll protect you," He said. From that day on, I completely changed my whole view on life. I opened up to people that I had never even considered as friends, and Kai helped me to do this. For at least a season I was able to put up with everything, until the day that Kai wasn't there to protect me. That day I was down in the wine cellar, bottling wine with my father. Kai had gone to town to pick up a few supplies. Much like the day in the kitchen, I had once again suffered from my clumsiness.

The bottle dropped from my hand, wine spilling all over the dirt floor. My father could not hold his anger in any longer. He hit my once across the face, and that was enough to send me to the ground. But he did not stop there. He continued to hit me. I screamed out for help, and I was just about to give up when Kai came running down the wine cellar stairs.

"Don't touch her!" He screamed. My dad stood wide eyed, almost realizing what he had done. I got up and ran to the house. In my room I started to pack my things, grabbing a handful of money and stuffing it in my pocket. As I scribbled down a note to my parents, Kai ran into the room.

"What are you doing?" He asked me.

"I'm leaving... for good," I said to him as I finished gathering my things. "I can't take it anymore," I said now crying.

"Please Karen... you can't leave... I love you," He said. I was stunned. That was the first time he had ever said that to me. For a second I stood there staring at him. I ran to him and wrapped my arms around him.

"I love you too Kai," I said, "but I can't stay here." I release my arms from around him and picked up my things. As I ran down the stairs Kai called to me.

"Please don't do this Karen." It was too late; I had made up my mind. As I stepped outside the door it was raining. I looked at my watch and saw that it was just about time the ferry would be arriving. I was finally going to leave this hell hole... for good. That moment brings me to now.

----------------------------------_End Flashback_---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The tears streamed down my face as I looked back at Kai still standing on the dock. He stared back and me, pulling off his bandana and throwing it down into the dark waters. The ferry sailed further and further away from Flowerbud Village. I could still see Kai standing there, but soon enough the result of my tears blurring my eyes, and the distance between us, made him disappear into the fog.


	2. City Life

**Chapter 2: City Life**

"KNOCK KNOCK!" The soft knocking at the door suddenly woke me up from a deep sleep. I pulled myself out of bed, and ran to the front door. As I opened it I saw a very unfriendly face.

"Karen! You are already 2 months behind on your rent. I have been kind enough to give you that much leave, but I can't just let you stay here for free," My landlord said to me as she impatiently stamped her foot on the cold wood floor.

"I'm sorry. I promise I'll have it to you by Friday when I get my paycheck," I replied anxiously as a pulled my hair behind my ears.

"You better, or I'm gonna have to kick you out... you understand that right?" She asked me.

"Yes..." was all I could reply. I shut the door and walked back into my cramped apartment. I threw myself down on the old couch and picked up the newspaper. I couldn't even bare to read it. This was my life.

It had been 2 years since I had left my home and come to the city. I was no longer that adolescent of 16, I was now an adult of 18, and have been living on my own for 2 years. I had my own apartment, and even a job, but I was never happy. I now lived in a crowded apartment building, with a high strung landlord, and some crazy neighbors. Lucky for me I met Sarah.

Sarah was 21 years old, and she had been living on her own for 7 years now. She lived in the same apartment building as me, and she really taught me the ropes. The day I found myself alone in the city without anywhere to stay, she took me in, and even got me my own room. She had become my best friend here in the city. She even found me a job.

I now worked for the most prestige newspaper in the city. I was one of the many secretaries, slaving away full time, with 8 hour days, but I desperately needed the money. It had gotten me through 2 years of city living, but recently had noticed that I no longer had enough money to live on. Living in the city was a tough life, but not as bad as what I had lived through back in Flowerbud. That was what I loved about the city.

I never again had to listen to my father yell, or be hit for any little mistake that I made. I no longer had to deal with my uncaring mother and her depression. I didn't have to deal with being called the town bitch, or having to work in the stupid bar where people would constantly harass me. That was the only thing that I loved about the city. But there was one thing that has constantly dampened my city living, the one thing that made me regret ever moving here. That one thing was Kai.

The day I left home was the last day that I ever saw him. I loved Kai with all my heart and I would never be able to get over him. In the city I had met many guys, but all of them were just jerks, the stereotypic shallow man that was only in for one thing. I never got serious with any of them, and every day I longed that Kai would come and get me. But who was I kidding. Never once had I written him, or called him up... I was too ashamed of what had become of my life. But one day I promised to myself that I would go back to that place, but I never meant for that day to come so soon.

"Karen! Are you up yet?" Sarah's voice screamed through my apartment. I mumbled in reply.

"Rise and Shine! Another wonderful day in this shit town," she said to me cheerfully. She always made me laugh no matter what kind of mood I was in. "Don't you have work today?" She asked me.

"No... today's is my only day off this week," I sighed. I stood up and went to go make a cup of coffee. I looked at the clock. It was already noon.

"How did I sleep so late," I mumbled as and rubbed my face. I pored a cup of coffee for both me and Sarah and we both sat down on the couch. I flicked on the television. On the news there was yet again another shooting, another robbery, and in lighter news, they found a cure to some African disease that only infects one out of every 5 million people. I couldn't even bare to watch. I set down my coffee and slumped down into the couch.

"O come one now," Sarah said to me, "It's such a beautiful day out today! Sarah went over to the curtains and pulled them open. Outside it was overcast, and seemed to be drizzling a little. I sighed again and closed my eyes. I could hear Sarah's footsteps walking toward the front door.

"Karen, your mail is here. Let's see... bill... bill... ads... bill... OH LOOK! There is something here addressed to you from somewhere called Flo- wer-bud," She said handing me the letter. I was stunned. I flipped the letter over in my hands, still amazed that I had received a letter from home. I looked at the return address... it was my own.

"Sarah... this is my home," I said, handing her the letter, "I don't want to open it."

"Oh Karen... come one just open it!" She said stuffing the letter back into my hands. I crunched the letter in my hand and ripped off one of the sides. I pulled out the letter. I was a hand written on beautiful floral stationary; it must be from my mother.

It read:

Dear Karen,

I know that I have not talked to you in 2 years now, but I have terrible news. On Fall 4th your father passed away, I guess that drinking finally caught up with him. Although he did not show it Karen, he truly did love you, and I am sure he would have wished to tell you that himself. He has left the Vineyard to you, Karen. I would understand if you did not wish to keep it, but I really hope that you will at least come home and think it over. I have missed you terribly, and I truly wish to see you again, and soon. Please come home.  
Love, Sasha

As I read over the letter my eyes filled with tears. I couldn't believe it, he's dead. Although I did not agree with him ever, I did love him; after all he was my father. I handed the letter to Sarah and let her read it over as I let everything soak in.

"Are you going to go?" She asked me. I sat there. I didn't know. I hadn't been there since 2 years ago, and surly things would have changed by now. The people, the places. What about Kai, surly he did not wish to see me? But I must go back, my mother needed me.

"Yes... I'm going back," I finally replied. That week went by so fast. I finished up work, and sent in a letter of resignation. I paid off all the money I owed for the apartment. I packed all of my clothes and belonging. It took me so long to say goodbye to Sarah, but I knew I would see her again soon enough. Nearly a week after I received the letter, I was on my way to the marina.

"Well... here I go," I said to Sarah, giving her the biggest hug ever.

"You come back now... y'hear," she said trying to keep up a good attitude, but I could hear her voice cracking from the tears. I put all my stuff on the ferry, and soon enough, the boat pulled away from the dock and I was on my way. The ride was long it seemed, much longer than when I first came to the city. It was nearly dusk when we neared Flowerbud. I peered over the railing, and in the distance I could see it. I could see the beach and the dock, I think I could even see Jack's farm. It was all so familiar to me now. I was home...


	3. Fallen Tears

**Chapter 3: Fallen Tears**  
  
The waves crashed against the side of the boat, as the ferry pulled into the dock. I pulled myself out from within the cabin, and retrieved my things from the lower deck. As I lifted my head, my eyes focused on one thing. There she stood. A woman I had not seen in over 2 years. A woman who never cared for me, who never loved me. A woman I could have gone the rest of my life without seeing ever again. My mother.  
  
I quickly refocused my eyesight to the deck floor as I walked across the boat. My luggage had already been thrown up on the dock, and the only thing I carried in my arms was a small bag.  
  
"Am I actually going to do this? Am I actually going to go home for the first time in 2 years?" I questioned myself as I walked. The walk across the boat deck was like a man on death row, walking to the gallows. Every step became harder and harder to take. Finally I came to the end of the line. Either I was going to go back to the city, or face my past. I stepped forward.  
  
"Karen... darling... I missed you so much," My mother said, finally breaking down in tears and wrapping her arms around me. She cried. She cried like I had never seen her cry before. The tears spilled out of her eyes and onto my shirt. Her sobs were muffled out as she cried into my shoulder. My mother really did care for me.  
  
I wrapped my arms around her, and comforted her as she sobbed. There we stood, for so long that the boat had already pulled away from the dock, and the tide had already begun to come in.  
  
"Let's go home mom," I said to her. She finally released her arms from around me and looked me straight in the face.  
  
"I'm so glad you're back, I missed you so much," She said to me.  
  
"Thanks mom. We can talk when we get back to the house," I said to her and picked up a suitcase in each hand, carefully making my way up the steep sand dune towards home. The walk was silent. Neither I nor my mother spoke one word. The town was quiet, and all that could be heard was the quiet rustling of the fall leaves.  
  
As we passed by Green Farm, I looked into the corral that was once so familiar to me, but everything looked different. The fence was old and falling apart, the grass was no longer the bright shade of green it use to be, the horses were not in great abundance anymore, and even the trees seemed to sag along the farm's outskirts. Flower Bud Village was dieing. My home... was dieing.  
  
We continued walking up. Past Jack's Farm, and past the open field at the base of Mother's Hill. It seemed to be a ghost town. Not one person could be seen. We walked up the hill toward the vineyard. I was actually going home, something that I thought I might never do. We walked down the rows of fences, each one bringing me one step closer. Finally we arrived.  
  
My jaw dropped, and I could almost feel tears start to swell up in my eyes. I dropped my head and covered my eyes with one hand. My mother wrapped one arm around my back.  
  
"It's all dead!" I cried.  
  
The vines hung limply from the trellises, each leaf crisp and brown. There were leaves scattered all over the ground. This was what I had given up city life for. This was what my future was. A dieing vineyard. With every leaf that fell, one memory of what this great place use to be, died along with it.  
  
"Ever since you left, your father gave up on making this place go. He didn't seem to care anymore. Kai tried to run this place on his own, but it was too much for a young boy to handle," Sasha said to me.  
  
"Kai... is he still here?" I asked, my eyes glimmering with the one small speck of hope I had left in me.  
  
"Yes dear, he just went down to town to pick up a few supplies," My mother said smiling. I smiled back at her and wiped the tears from my eyes.  
  
"Come now, let's go inside and have a nice cup of tea," she said to me.  
  
"Not right now, I need to be alone," I said to her.  
  
"Alright," she replied and took my bags into the house for me. I stared back at the vineyard.  
  
"I can't believe this is all I have," I said to myself, "This is all that's left of my father. My father..." I couldn't take it. I couldn't look at the vineyard for one more second. I grabbed my small bag and ran into the wine cellar. It was the one place where I knew I could be alone. I ran down the stairs into the cold cellar. There were still wine barrels stacked up beside the wall. I slouched down up against the wall... and cried.  
  
I couldn't hold it in any longer. There I sat, for how long, I don't know, but I cried. The tears seemed never ending, each one falling to the cold dirt floor. It was silent, just the sound of my sobs could be heard echoing through the cellar. Finally, I heard something.  
  
The door upstairs quietly opened, and someone stepped inside. I heard a thump, and footsteps.  
  
"Go away... I want to be alone," I said flatly.  
  
"Karen? Is that you?" the voice called. I knew that voice. That was a voice I loved. That was the voice that I had missed for 2 long years. I stood up and wiped the tears from my eyes. I slowly walked toward the stairs. Someone walked down the stairs.  
  
"Karen! It is you!" The boy exclaimed. He ran up to me and threw his arms around me. He picked me up off the ground, spun me around, and placed me back down upon it once again. He was very built now, but still the same. "Karen... I missed you. I thought you would never come back."  
  
"I missed you too, Kai," I replied. There were tears still streaming down my cheeks, and a sniffle could still be heard.  
  
"What's wrong Karen?" He asked. "I thought you would be happy to see me."  
  
"It's not you... it's me... it's all my fault!" I said bursting out in tears once again. I collapsed onto my knees and placed my head in my heads. "It's all my fault that he's gone, it's all my fault that the vineyard is dead... it's all my fault..." my voice started to fade away.  
  
Kai kneeled down in front of me and picked up my chin. He looked me straight in the face and wiped the tears from my eyes.  
  
"It's not your fault Karen..." he said. There we sat... I felt like I had only seen him but yesterday. We talked... and I cried... and he comforted me... everything was back to normal. Finally I stopped crying. We both stood up. I looked into his big brown eyes and hugged him. He held me in his arms, and I finally told him how I truly felt.  
  
"Kai... I missed you so much. I'm so glad I'm finally home again. I never meant to leave you that night, but I needed to get away from everything," I said, "Kai... I'm finally home; we can finally start again where we left off... I love you," I said to him, and kissed him. It was exactly what I missed for 2 years... being with him... but the kiss ended too suddenly. He pushed me away. I looked at him, confused by what had just happened.  
  
"Karen... we can't just do that. It's not that easy," He said to me turning away.  
  
"Why," was all I could say, "Everything was going so great before?"  
  
"It was... before you left here. Yes, when you left I was heartbroken. I thought about you every day. But finally I just convinced myself that you weren't coming back. I grabbed hold of my life..." He said in reply.  
  
"Please... no... don't do this to me," I cried.  
  
"I'm engaged to marry Popuri next spring..."


	4. Missed You

**Chapter 4: Missed You**  
  
"What do you mean you're engaged to Popuri!?" I cried, breaking down in tears again.  
  
"Karen, you didn't honestly think that I was just going to sit around and wait for you? I mean, when you left, I didn't even know if you were ever going to return!" He screamed back.  
  
I collapsed onto the ground and placed my head in between my knees. My head hurt and I felt dizzy. This couldn't be happening to me. The one thing that I was looking forward to when I came home didn't care about me. Not only did he not care about me, but he was getting married. I picked up my head and glared at Kai.  
  
"Kai… I can't believe this… you said you'd wait for me… you promised me!" I cried, my hair dangling in front of my tear filled eyes. Kai turned around and faced me, his fists were clenched and there was a single tear streaming down his face.  
  
"We've already been through this Karen! Yes… two years ago when you left, I said that I would wait for you to return. But Karen… I loved you, and you left! I didn't know what to think anymore, and I still don't know what to think now!" He screamed and pushed open the wine cellar door, slamming it behind him, and leaving me in tears on the cold ground.  
  
"He's right," I mumbled to myself, "I did leave him. He was always so good to me… and all I did was leave him alone while I ran off to the city. It's my fault… it's all my fault."  
  
I quickly stood up and ran out of the wine cellar, trying to catch up to Kai, but by the time I got out, he was no where to be seen. I pulled my hair behind my ears and started toward to entrance to the vineyard. I had to apologize to him. I ran down the rows of fences, tears streaming out of my eyes. The tears blurred my vision so much that I could not see where I was going, but I still continued to run.  
  
"BAM!" I crashed into something at full speed. The wind was knocked out of me and I fell to the ground. I heard a groan, but my eyes were still too blurred to see what it was.  
  
"Are you alright miss?" a voice asked me. I wiped the tears from my eyes, and mumbled that I was fine, not even bothering to look up.  
  
"Karen… is that you?" the voice said, and the figure knelt down in front of me. I picked up my head and stared right into the eyes of a familiar face.  
  
"Jack!" I said hugging him. At first he was limp, but then he returned the embrace.  
  
"Karen, I knew you were coming back, but I didn't know you were coming home so soon," He said to me smiling.  
  
"The ferry just arrived today," I said in reply. He helped me up to my feet; I was still a little out of breath from the crash.  
  
"That's wonderful! Oh… I'm sorry to hear about your father," He said to me, his expression changing from happy to sad.  
  
"So was I…" I mumbled. I became quiet.  
  
"I'm sorry to bring that up. Hey, how about you come over to my place? We can have some hot cocoa, and you can tell me about what you've been up to lately!" He exclaimed.  
  
"That sounds great," I replied smiling again. _"Yet another person from my past that I forgot about in the past two years,"_ I said to myself. Together we walked into his farm, and he opened the door to his once small farm house.  
  
"Wow Jack… this place sure has changed. It looks great!" I said to him, peering around the farm. The fields were no longer filled with weeds, but instead there were vegetables and flowers growing everywhere. Even his house was not the old shack that it use to be, it was much bigger!  
  
"Thanks Karen… I've been working hard," He said laughing. We entered the farm house. Inside it was fabulous. He had a large couch, and everything was decorated so wonderfully. There was even a kitchen and a bathroom. Jack really had been working hard.  
  
"Jack… this place is great!" I said to him. "I bet your wife helped you decorate though."  
  
"Actually… I'm still single sadly," he laughed, rubbing his hand along the back of his neck, seeming to be embarrassed.  
  
"I'm surprised… when I lived here there always seemed to be quite a few girls after you. What ever happened to you and Maria? You two seemed to be inseparable," I asked.  
  
"We broke up nearly a season ago," he said, slumping down into the couch.  
  
"What happened?" I asked sitting down next to him.  
  
"She got pregnant," He said, mumbling.  
  
"Well that's great!" I said, not realizing that it wasn't as great as it seemed.  
  
"Yeah… it would have been great… if I was the father. The week I went out of town to get some supplies, she had a little 'get together' with her ex-boyfriend, Harris," He replied. I felt horrible for questioning to the point where he was depressed. I quickly tried to change the subject.  
  
"I'm sorry to hear that… so… what else has been going on here in Flower Bud village?" I asked.  
  
"Well… the town square has been redecorated; the library has gotten a whole ship load of new books. Oh, Elli got married to Jeff about 2 seasons after you left, and they now have a little baby boy named Nicholas," Jack said, a smile finally returning to his face.  
  
"That's wonderful! I'm going to have to go congratulate her tomorrow, it's a little late tonight," I said. I looked at the clock; it was nearly 10 pm. "I think I'm going to call it a night," I said standing up.  
  
"It was nice talking to you Karen… I missed you," he said to me also standing now. I was shocked. I wasn't sure what to say yet. I had never thought of Jack in that way, nor did I ever think that he thought of me like that.  
  
"Thank you Jack, at least I know I have someone to turn to in this town," I said to him smiling.  
  
"See you around?" He asked.  
  
"Of course," I replied, exiting the warm farm house.  
  
_"Maybe things were going to get better…"_ I thought to myself as I walked back to the vineyard. 


	5. Cold Fall Days

**Chapter 5: Cold Fall Days**

I could hear the ticking of the clock as I stared at the scarf that lay in my hands. I found that over the past week back home, I had picked up my mother's old habits of knitting. But I was nothing like my mother. My mother made wonderful, colorful, pieces of art., something to treasure over the years, something to keep you warm in the cold. But me... my work was nothing special.

Kai had gone out early this morning, to help Popuri with her fall planting. I cringed at the sound of her name, and quickly threw the thoughts from my mind. I stabbed at the scarf with the needle and angrily wrapped another loop. My mother had also left, going down town to set up arrangements for the funeral this Sunday. I was alone today, in this dark gloomy house that I once called home. It was different and foreign, and yet it seemed the same. The pictures were hung in different spots, and the old couch had been replaced with a new one, but it still smelled the same. I sighed and slumped into the chair.

There was a soft knock at the door, and I placed my scarf upon the coffee table. As I looked out the window, I could see the wind blowing around the lifeless vines, and the dark clouds covering the sun. It had been a cold week, and I knew it was just going to get colder. I slowly opened the door, and a small figure quickly pushed its way inside.

"Sasha... I need your help," the voice said turning around, closing the door behind her. She quickly stopped at stared at me, letting out a small gasp as she finished shutting the door.

"My goodness! Karen... is that you!" the girl said wrapping her arms around me. "Your mother told me that you would be returning here for the funeral, but I never imagined you would come so quickly... Karen... it's me, Elli!" She said, a smile appearing on her anxious face. As I looked at her, her face became a familiar sight. Years ago she had had shoulder length brown hair that hung neatly on her shoulders. Now, she had it short cut, much of a shock to me at first, but soon I came to like it as it framed her delicate face.

"Elli!" I exclaimed, returning the warm embrace. "It's been so long... what's wrong?" I questioned, noticing the worried look on her face. She plopped down on the couch; I seated myself next to her.

"It's my grandmother, Ellen. She's gotten sick, and recently has started forgetting things. Just yesterday she even forgot my name, and started calling me by my mother's name. I'm starting to become very worried," she said, talking very quickly.

"Oh... Elli, I'm so sorry. Is there anything I can do to help out?" I asked her, still a little uncomfortable, having not seen her for two years.

"We have already consulted the midwife about her condition, and there is nothing her in FlowerBud that we can do to help her. Jeff suggested that we take her to the city, but I can't possibly take Nicholas with me. That's why I came here. I wanted to ask Sasha, your mother, if she could watch Nicholas while we were gone. Just for a few days, a week at the most," she said pleadingly. I could tell she was nervous, for I watched her as she twiddled her thumbs, occasionally biting at the tips of her fingernail.

"I'm sorry, my mother isn't here right now. But don't worry, I'm sure that she will be just fine watching over him. She took care of me for 16 years, I think she can handle another one," I replied jokingly, trying to lighten the mood a little. Elli wrapped her arms around me again, sighing in relief.

"Oh! Thank you so much! You don't know how much this means to me! We are leaving as soon as we can, so is it possible I could drop Nick off in an hour? I'm sorry it is at such late notice, but the last ferry trip leaves at five," she said, looking me in the face.

"No problem at all, my mother should be home by then," I replied. Elli hugged me yet again, stood up from the couch, and after saying goodbye, she ran out of the house back into the cold weather. I took a deep breath, and shut the door, shutting out the cold air with it.

"_What have I gotten myself into?"_ I laughed, and sat down again on the chair. "I do hope Sasha isn't mad..." I knew my mother, and she was always happy to help someone out. She loved children, and I knew that she had often wished for another child after me, but my father would never permit it. I picked up my knitting once more and looked at the clock. It was nearly four, and I had a lot of work to do.

That one hour went by extra fast. I had cleaned up the main floor, my mother returned home, and I told her of the plan. She was ecstatic, and smiled sweetly as she impatiently cleaned the kitchen waiting for Elli to arrive with the baby. I hadn't seen my mother this happy in a while, and it was a nice change.

Soon enough there was a second knock on the door. This time, I opened the door to see a different familiar face. It was Jeff, but his face could barely be seen through the mountain of things he held in his arms. He carried everything from blanket and bottle and food, to cribs and strollers and feeding tables. Truly... what had I gotten us into? Jeff stumbled into the house, quickly trying to set up everything, handing me something to hold every so often as he worked away and baby proofing our home. Soon enough came Elli, holding Nick in her arms.

He was precious. Much like his mother he had mouse brown hair, so fine and soft to the touch. His eyes were big and bright like his mother's, but were a dark blue like his father's. He had chubby cheeks, and a big smile, and all I could do was smile in return. Elli touched her finger to his nose, and he giggled playfully in reply.

"I'm sorry Nicky," she said to the baby, the name that she so lovingly called him, "You're gonna have to stay with Aunt Sasha for the week. But don't worry, I'll be back as soon as I can," she said, handing the baby gently over to my mother. She held Nick in her arms as though he was her own.

"Don't worry dear, you go and help your grandmother. We'll take good care of Nick while you're gone," she said, smiling over at me. My mother was truly a different person. Elli and Jeff quickly packed up their things, Elli giving her baby boy a kiss goodbye, and Jeff playfully rubbing his hair before they left, and soon enough it was just me, my mother, and a tiny baby in the house.

It was silent at first, neither I nor my mother saying a word. It was quite awkward, until Nick broke the silence by letting out a loud hiccup. We both laughed.

"Do you remember when I was that small Mom," it was weird to use the word after two long years.

"I do..." she sighed. "Nick is so much better behaved though. You were an active child, always causing trouble wherever you went," she replied. I laughed, and playfully bounced Nick on my knee. My mother continued to tell me stories of when I was young, and I felt like nothing bad had ever happened between us. It was wonderful. Finally my mother got up and went to the kitchen, and started to prepare dinner.

I was left alone in the room with Nick. I had never truly held a baby before. All the girls in Flowerbud were born at the same time, and it seemed that no other child was born after that. I had never had younger brothers or sisters, so this was a big change for me. Nick looked up at me, blowing a small spit bubble, which quickly popped when it got to big. I laughed and he looked up at me with his big blue eyes, and laughed in return. Suddenly, there was yet another knock on the door, the third one that night.

"I'll get it!" I yelled to the kitchen and picked up Nick in my arms, quickly walking to the door, and opening it to reveal Jack's smiling face.

"Hey Karen... WHOA!?! You didn't tell me you had a kid!!" Jack exclaimed, obviously startled by the baby in my arms. I laughed at Jack's misunderstanding, and quickly answered to calm his nerves.

"Hah... don't worry Jack, he's not mine! It's Nick, Elli's boy," I laughed. Jack laughed in reply, rubbing his hand along the back of his neck, obviously embarrassed at his mistake.

"Oh... haha... sorry... for a second there I was a little startled. What's Nick doing here this late, and without his mother?" He asked as he stepped into the house.

"We're watching him for the week. Elli and Jeff took Ellen to the city. I'm pretty sure she's just fine, but they want to make sure," I replied.

"Oh, well that's good," He said. "I just came over wondering if you wanted to...you know... hang out?" I was startled. _Since when did Jack want to hang out with me?_

"Well, I have to watch over Nick... but you are welcome to stay for dinner!" I exclaimed quickly, hoping that Jack would accept the offer.

"You sure? Sounds good to me, I'm use to eating that microwavable food. Truthfully, I'm not that great of a cook," he laughed.

"Well, my mother is a WONDEFUL cook!" I replied, my mother laughing as she entered the room.

"I'm really not that wonderful, but you are welcome to stay, it will be done in ten minutes," she replied. Jack took off his shoes, and helped me set the table for dinner. I smiled over at him as I placed the silverware on the napkins. It was nice to have a big dinner again. In the city, I usually ate by myself, so it was a nice change. I pulled up the highchair for Nick, and soon enough dinner was served and ready to be eaten.

Me, my mother, and Jack all seated ourselves at the table, Nick already sitting in the highchair, just waiting to eat. After saying grace, we all dug into the various food that lay scattered over the big dining table. There was a roast Turkey with mashed potatoes, green beans, fresh eggplant, and three glasses of wine. It seemed to me like Thanksgiving. Occasionally throughout my meal, I reached over and feed a spoonful of baby food to Nick. My mother gazed at me lovingly, and I was happy to see that I was pleasing her. I told my mother and Jack about the city, and they listened inattentively about the life that I had lived. When we all finished dinner, Jack thanked Sasha for the wonderful meal, Sasha blushing at the compliment. We quickly cleaned up and Jack and I seated ourselves on the couch, Nick curled up in Jack's arms.

After dinner the phone rang, and Sasha quickly answered. With a short conversation, she hung up.

"Sorry Karen, I have to go back to town to handle a few more things for Sunday, can you watch Nick for a few hours?" she asked, grabbing her coat.

"No problem," I smiled, and Sasha quickly ran out the door. It was just Me and Jack and the baby. I flicked on the T.V. to break the silence, Jack, a little more comfortable now, slumped back into the couch. Jack gazed down lovingly at Nick, Nick's eyes slowly closing.

"He really likes you Jack..." I said to him. Jack turned to me and smiled, and then looked down again at the angelic face.

"He sure is sweet. I hope that someday I will grow up and become a dad. I think I would be a good dad..." he said, gently picking Nick up and placing him in my arms. Nick's eyes closed and he snuggled into me.

_"How wonderful a thing,"_ I thought to myself. I peered over at Jack who was looking down at the baby that lay in my arms. He adverted his gaze to the scene on the television, the soft glow that lit the dark room. I rocked the baby softly in my arms, and as Jack leaned into the corner of the couch, I found myself following and leaning gently on his chest. I could feel each breath he took and I turned my head gently to face him.

His blue eyes look straight at me, and slowly his lips came to touch mine. Softly, he laid a kiss upon my lips, just a sweet gesture, and he layed back slowly falling alsleep. I wasn't sure what was happening quite yet, or what I was going to do, but for right now I felt comfortable, and soon enough I fell asleep, the baby asleep in my arms, and me asleep in Jack's.

* * *

_Sorry for the repost, I needed to make a few changes to this chapter, and I accidently deleted it instead of replacing it. Sorry for my mistakes. I also wanted to say thanks to all my reviewers! Please keep with me on this story, with school going, it might take me a while to update, but thatnks for reading my story fo far! If you want to contact me for any reasons, give me some ideas for my stories, or have a request for something.. just email me at PacificTwist65 at aol . com (It won't let me write it out!!)_


	6. Goodbye

**Chapter 6: Goodbye**

I had finally grown accustom to being awake at three a.m. to tend to the cry of the poor baby. I had finally grown accustom to constantly picking the baby up in my arms whenever he cried. I had finally grown accustom to the sweet giggles that he made, and the small spit bubbles he blew. Although there was so much responsibility that went along with little Nick, I enjoyed having him around, and I especially enjoyed that Jack was beside me the entire way.

Nick stayed with me and my mother for about three days, and today was the day of the funeral. That morning when I woke up it was a gloomy day outside. The wind could be heard brushing through the dead vines, and the gray clouds could be seen outside my bedroom window. I quickly got up and dressed, most appropriately in a black dress. I picked Nick up from his cradle and walked down stairs to feed him. I set him on the couch along with a rattle to keep him busy and went to go fine some baby food from the cabinet. As I rummaged through the many jars there was a soft knock at the door.

I picked up Nick from the couch and went to open the door. To my surprise, outside stood Elli and Jeff, but it was no happy surprise indeed. As I looked upon the face of my old friend her eyes were red and puffy, her porcelain cheeks stained with tears, and a small frown was formed by her lips. I could tell by the look in her eyes that all she wanted to do right now was hold her baby. I handed Nick over to his rightful mother and she gently cradled him in her arms, the tears now streaming from her eyes.

"Oh Nick, my sweet little Nicky. Grandma Ma is gone… and she's never coming back," Elli cried as I welcomed her and Jeff into the house. Elli seated herself on the couch, holding Nick close to her heart. "She's gone…" I went to go put on some hot water for some tea. Although I had many questions to ask, this moment was not the right one to ask them all. Jeff put him arm around his wife and cuddled her near.

After a few minutes of quiet sobs, the teapot let off a soft whistle. I grabbed two cups from the cabinet and made some tea for all three of us. I returned to the main room and handed Jeff a cup first. Elli placed Nick upon the floor and let him play with his toys, and I handed her a cup of steaming tea.

"Thank you very much for everything you have done Karen. You don't know how much I appreciate it. I'm sorry I just burst in here…" she said to me, as she attempted to take a sip of tea, her hands were still a little shaky.

"It was no problem. I'm very sorry to hear about your grandmother…" I really wasn't sure what else to say. As we sat in the main room, with the gloomy clouds outside and the wind blowing against the door, Elli told me about what happened. A little later, my mother walked in the door, also comforting Elli with open arms. My heart felt like it was going to break any second. So much grief in one day, so many tears that had been shed. What was truly happening here?

"I'm sorry, but I must go be alone for a little while. I will see you all at the funeral," I said and picked up my coat before walking out the door. The wind chilled my bare arms as I wrapped the coat around my back. I didn't know where I was going, but I just couldn't stand to hear any more of death.

As I walked down the road, I found that for some odd reason, all I wanted to do right now was talk to Jack. I wandered into his farm slowly, my breathe causing steam in front of my eyes. I went up to the main door and soft knocked. Soon enough the door opened.

"Karen, what's wrong?" Jack said, holding open arms for me to fall into. I didn't cry, not one tear, he just held me in his arms in the cold until I finally calmed down enough to talk. We walked into his house, the warmth from his furnace hitting my face in a big gust. I sat down on the couch and Jack got a cup of cocoa.

"Elli's grandma died. She came back this morning and got Nick. Today is the day of the funeral… and I'm already a mess," I said to him quite calmly, my eyes staring coldly at the ground.

"Don't worry Karen, it will all be fine," He said to me… and for some reason… I believed him. Over these past few days Jack and I had become very close. He had come over every day to help me take care of Nick, and to help around with the house, since lately Kai was spending more and more time with Popuri, mostly arranging their wedding. But yes, Jack truly was a life saver, he was my shoulder to lean on, and without him, I don't think I would have made it through this past week. I spent two hours at Jack's house, mostly just talking. It was finally time for the funeral.

"Come on Karen… we got to go," Jack said to me, offering his hand to help me up from the couch. I looked in the mirror and pulled my hair behind my shoulders. I pulled on my coat and me and Jack walked hand in hand down to the church. We were the second to arrive, the first was my mother. She stood like a stone staring down at the coffin that contained her husband… my dad. I dropped his hand and told him to wait there, and I walked over to my mother's side.

"He really wasn't a bad man… you know that don't you Karen? My mom said to me. I couldn't answer, cuz I really didn't know. "He never meant to truly hurt you he just lost his temper sometimes. When you were first born he went around the whole town telling everyone that he had the best daughter ever. When you were a baby he use to sing you to sleep every night. It was just over the years, with the vineyard going down the whole, he started to drink… but Karen, he never wanted to hurt you, he loved you, he just didn't remember how to show you that." I broke down. I hadn't cried all day. I had convinced myself that I didn't care about him, and that I was glad he was gone, but now after hearing what my mother had to say, I knew that was only a cover up to hide my feeling.

"I know he loved me…" I cried into my mother's shoulder as she wrapped her arms around me. I released my grip around her and for a while we both stood looking upon the coffin. Eventually people started to arrive, and to my surprise, almost everyone in town came. Everyone came up to me and my mother, expressing their sympathy, and then going off to one of the pews to converse.

"Karen" A voice called from behind me. I turned around to see one of my best friends in the world. Ann. "Karen, I'm very sorry about your father. I'm so glad you came back, I missed you."

"Ann, you always were my best friend," I said to her, and she wrapped her arms around me, and then also retreated to a pew with her father. Finally the pastor came and the service began. I was seated in the second row, behind me mother, and Jack seated beside me. He tried every way possible to comfort me as he took my hand in his, but I still felt cold inside.

As I looked around at everyone, I couldn't help but feel cold. Everywhere I looked in the small church there was grief. Elli stood in the back row with her young son in her arms, still crying over the death of her own grandmother. My mother, the tears still streaming down he face as the pastor read from the bible. Even Kai, who stood next to his soon to be wife, looked sad amongst the crowd. He blankly stared at the coffin, and I could tell that he too was filled with grief. This whole place was grief.

At the end of the service every person took turns going by the coffin and saying a final word. I watched every person go by, murmuring something, and then passing. I was the last to go. I walked cautiously up to the coffin and placed my hand on it. It was cold… death.

"Goodbye Dad…"


	7. Slammed Doors

**Chapter 7: Slammed Doors**

**I**t had been two weeks since the funeral, three weeks since my father had died, and three weeks since I had come back home. Home… it truly was home now… or was it? It felt as though something had been missing. Maybe it was my father, maybe the vineyard, but I wasn't really sure quite yet what it was. But eventually that missing feeling started to disappear, and things became the way they once were before I left.

Well not everything was the way it once was. The funeral for Ellen was held later the same week as my father, and recently Elli had hid herself away in the small kitchen of the bakery, producing pie after pie, and cake after cake, until she would just fall asleep from exhaustion. I would occasionally stop by to pick up some pastries, and while there, try to comfort my grieving friend.

Elli's family was not the only one that had changed. Green Farm had also changed, the place that Ann had once roamed the fields everyday, taking care of the cows and sheep, and riding the horses through the tall grasses. Every trip to town I would walk by, and to me it looked as though there was not one animal left in the fields. I had seen Ann around lately, mostly around the church, and we had had a few good conversations, but it never felt right to bring up what had happened to the farm. I just figured it was because of money, but I was to soon find out that wild dogs had killed off most of thecattle one night,along withher prized horse Akio.

Other than that, everything else about the town seemed to be the same. The shops still stood in town square, the mountain still looked the same, other than the newly built hot spring, and everyone else was still up to their old business and old jobs. Popuri and her parents still worked diligently at the flower shop. The church still held session every Sunday morning, and the bakery was still thriving. Duke had done his best to keep the bar running smoothly without me as his waitress, and it seemed to me that people were probably glad to be gone with my attitude.

It was funny how after two years, and everything bad seeming to happen at one time, that this town still worked like a clock. It amazed me, this little town. The place that I had run away from, because of one old grumpy man, I was able to call home once again, and for the first time in my life, I was happy to call it home.

* * *

**T**he sun woke me up that morning. The wind could be heard rustling the leaves on the tree right outside my bedroom. If it was two years ago, I would have been out in the vineyard two hours ago, picking the juicy grapes from their vines. But this year, there would be no grapes, a concept that I had not yet held in my grasp. I pulled myself out of bed and slid my feet onto the cold wood floor. I quickly dressed, and once again found myself with nothing to do. After a while I finally wandered outside and started to walk up and down the long rows of the vineyard. 

Occasionally I would reach out and touch one the dieing vines, hoping that my fingers would fall upon a blooming fruit, but no luck. Finally I just sat on the ground and tilted my head down to shield my eyes from the sun. I just sat there thinking, something that I had not had the time nor patience to do in a long time. It was quiet, until suddenly voices from a distance broke the silence.

"Come on Popuri, let's go inside. It's a little chilly out here. I can get you some tea and we can talk about the wedding plans," a deeper voice said.

"Uh, okay…" a lighter voice followed. I knew exactly who it was. Kai… and his beloved fiancé. Popuri and Kai, together, something I never would have imagined, but I guess this was just the work of destiny. What was destiny anyways? A load of crap if you ask me. I had always through that Kai and I would be together. It was almost as if I could feel it whenever I was with him, I thought that it would be _my_ destiny to be with him. But obviously the Goddess was punishing me. Whatever I had done, she decided that it was wrong, and for my punishment, she took him. No, she didn't _take him_, she _gave him_ Popuri.

Although I hated it, I had become use to seeing the two around the vineyard. Every morning the pink haired girl would come by, and the two would go out somewhere. Occasionally I would see then at the beach, or just walking hand in hand through town. Popuri and Kai were quite the talk of the town. Everyone was waiting for the wedding, which was going to be held in the beginning of spring. I would hear people say, "What a cute couple", and "they will have beautiful children". It disgusted me, but I knew there was nothing I could do about it. Besides, I had moved on myself. I had Jack, a new friend, maybe more. I was happy… wasn't I?

Suddenly I heard the front door swing open and bash against the side of the house breaking my thought. Immediately following the first crash, the door flew open again and hit the house, then once again closed.

"Kai… please… you have to understand," came the voice of Popuri.

"Oh, I understand you perfectly… I just don't understand _why_ you are doing this to me!" Kai replied. I peaked out from behind the dead vine and watched the two. They stood in the middle of the yard, Kai turned away from Popuri toward the wine cellar, and Popuri looking at him pleadingly with her rose eyes.

"Kai, you know I love you. I love you above everyone else, and I never wanted to hurt you. It's just... a chance like this only comes once in a life time. It's my dream, you know it is…" Popuri said, taking a step toward Kai. He turned around and looked at her.

"So you are willing to _cancel the wedding_, just so you can go to the city and try to become a model." When I heard this I almost felt my heart stop… she was canceling the wedding! "Popuri, listen to yourself, you're being foolish. It's a big city. Do you think they are going to pick a little town girl like you over girls that have lived their whole lives in the city?" Kai responded.

"Kai, the letter told me that they are looking for all kinds of people. I think I have a good chance, and in three days I will be leaving on the ferry for the city. You're being unfair! I can't believe you don't believe in me!" she whined, letting the letter slip out of her hand and fall to the dirt ground.

"_I'm being unfair!? _Popuri, I have always believed in you, and you know that, so why are you breaking my heart like this? Fine… just go. I obviously never meant enough to you. Go to the city, and _try_ to become a model, but when you don't succeed, and have to come back here because you're all out of money, I don't ever want to see you around here, nor do I ever want to talk to you. The wedding is off… goodbye." Kai stormed past Popuri and walked into the house, slamming the door behind him, andleaving the Pink haired girl in tears behind him.

"Kai… I… I…I'm sorry…" she said, and walked down the road back to town.

I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. All I could do was replay the two's conversation over and over again in my head. Could this actually be happening? At the time, I really wasn't sure what I should be feeling. All I knew was one thing…

_The wedding was off…_


	8. It Started With a Kiss

**Chapter 8: It Started With a Kiss**

**T**wo days since the fight, and Kai was still locked up in his room. I guess I couldn't blame him though; he had just had his heart ripped out, and trampled as a matter of fact. But why should it matter to me, he had broken my heart hadn't he. I tossed the idea out of my mind, and poured myself a small cup of coffee. It was the twenty-seventh of fall, nearing the end of the season, and winter was soon to be in full force. There had already been two light snowfalls, none stayed upon the warm ground though.

Jack had come over that morning, and we had just talked for a couple hours. It was nice, just being with him. We were now known as a couple around the town, which really didn't bug me. Actually, I found the fact quite comforting. It showed that I had gotten over Kai, right? I sat down on the couch next to Jack, slowly sipping my coffee. I giggled as he kissed my neck playfully. Suddenly there was a soft knock on the door. I gently pushed Jack away, and rose to answer the door. Outside was Ann, with a huge smile on her face.

"Karen… oh I have such wonderful news, do you have time?" she said, her excitement clearly escaping in the tone of her voice. She peered behind me and saw Jack seated on the couch. "Oh I see you have company," she said grinning at me. I could feel myself blush. I welcomed her inside and brought her a cup of coffee. She was so excited she couldn't even sit down. I smiled at my friend, it was nice to see her happy, especially after such a streak of bad luck.

"Okay well... here it goes," she said taking a deep breath. She reached inside her coat pocket and pulled out the most beautiful thing I have ever laid my eyes upon. It was a blue feather. I set my cup down on the end table and just stared at it in awe. "Cliff proposed to me!" Ann exclaimed. A huge smile brushed over her face, and I jumped up from the couch giving her a huge hug.

"Oh Ann! I am so happy for you!" I exclaimed. Ann danced giddily around the room. And then finally came to rest in front of me again. I had not seen her this happy since before I left Flower Bud.

"When did he propose?" Jack asked, standing up and joining me and Ann.

"Last night. We went to the summit to watch the sunset, and right there, he just pulled out that feather and proposed. He was so nervous, it was so cute!" She giggled.

"Well, that Cliff sure is a lucky guy," Jack said, giving Ann a kiss on the cheek and a hug. I smiled at Jack. He was so sweet.

"Well Karen, that's not the only reason I came over," Ann said. Jack and I seated ourselves on the couch, and Ann right across on the chair. "You see, you are the only one I have told, other than my father, and well I was hoping that you would be my maid of honor," she said smiling. I was stunned. Ann and I had always been friends, but I never thought that I would be her maid of honor. I accepted graciously. "Also there is one more surprise. Well, Cliff and I have decided to have a party tomorrow night, to tell the rest of the town the news. It's going to be in the barn, and everyone is invited. I really hope that both of you can come."

"Of course, I wouldn't miss it for the world," I said to my friend, and Jack nodded in agreement. We continued to talk about future plans, and around dinner time, both Ann and Jack left. I was so happy for my friend. She deserved a great guy like Cliff. The day was set. Ann was to have a party tomorrow, to announce her engagement to Cliff. My date, Jack, would be accompanying me. Everything seemed to be perfect, and yet, as I heard the rumbling of a moving body in the room above me, I couldn't help but think about Kai. I really hoped that he would go to the party, to get his mind off things. But right now I didn't have to think about that. I had a party to get ready for.

* * *

**I**t was the twenty-eighth. The day of the party. I was so excited. Jack would be here any moment to pick me up. I looked at myself in the mirror. For the first time in a while I was happy with what I saw. I had on a quite slimming little black dress. My hair hung gracefully on my back, and my green eyes matched perfectly with my emerald necklace. I smiled as I slipped on a pair of strappy sandals and walked down the stairs.

Soon enough Jack arrived looking quite handsome. I said goodbye to my mother and exited the house, stepping out into the cold nearly winter air. I didn't feel cold though. Just being next to Jack made me warm all over. We walked hand in hand to Green Ranch, and as soon as we got there, we saw the lights of the barn lighting up the whole field. Ann sure had done a great job of decorating the place. As we stepped inside the barn doors, we saw everyone from the town, excluding my mother… and Kai.

"Why did Ann have us come here?"

"What's going on?"

"Mmmmmmm food!"

There were questions and comments buzzing all over. Everyone was still unaware of the engagement. I smiled at the confused looks on everyone's faces. Soon after we arrived, Ann and Cliff stood up on a small stage set in the front of the room. The whole mood of the thing felt like a high school dance, music blasting and everyone having a good time. Ann took a microphone in her hand, taking Cliff's hand in the other.

"Excuse me everyone," she said quietly. Everyone continued talking. "EXCUSE ME!" she yelled. Everyone stopped and quickly directed there attention to the cute red-headed girl. She smiled, a little embarrassed, and continued with her speech. "Well everyone, the reason I asked you all to come, is because I… we… have a big announcement to make. Cliff and I… well… we are engaged!" Everyone seemed to be stunned at first, but then smiles came upon everyone's faces, and a huge cheer filled the room. There had not been a wedding in Flowerbud since Elli and Jeff's wedding nearly two years ago. I smiled at all the excitement in the room, and Jack gave me a soft kiss on the lips.

"The wedding is going to be in the spring, and all of you are invited!" Cliff added. Everyone cheered once again. Many people went up to the two love birds, giving their congratulations. I was so happy for my friend. Cliff kissed his bride to be, as Ann left his side to come talk to me.

"Karen… I have something _very _important to tell you," she whispered in me ear. I looked at her wide eyed. What else could there be going on in my friend's life. I told Jack I would be right back, and followed my friend outside. She looked at me nervously, fiddling with the edges of her dress.

"Ann… what's going on?" I asked her. I had never really seen her act like this. She looked like she was going to sing and cry at the same time. I took my friend by the shoulders and looked her in the eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Karen… I'm… I'm… pregnant…" she said, and broke down crying, kneeling on the damp grass. I knelt down next to me friend. The second surprise in two days.

"Ann… you're crying…" I said. I didn't know how to comfort my friend. She looked up at me and wiped the tears from her eyes and smiled.

"I'm not sad… they are tears of joy. I just never imagined me… being a mother. I haven't even told Cliff yet. You are the only one who knows," she said, wrapping her arms around me. I returned the embrace. This was wonderful.

"Ann… I am _so_ happy for you," I choked back some tears. I was so happy for my friend. We stood up and looked at each other, laughing as we saw each other crying. We wiped the tears from our eyes, and went back into the barn, linked arms, smiling the biggest smiles. Cliff and Jack stood in the middle of the room as we approached them.

"What are you two so happy about?" Cliff asked with a grin on his face. I looked at my friend, and we both laughed. I nudged my friend a little with my elbow. She knew what she had to do. She took Cliff by the hand and led him outside. I wanted to tell Jack so bad about the good news, but I was going to wait. After all, it was Ann's business, not mine. The party continued, and a little later Ann and Cliff returned to the barn, latched onto each other, with huge grins on their faces. I couldn't help but laugh. The party went on, late into the night and into the early morning. Soon the barn stated to clear as people returned to their houses. Jack and I were the last to leave. I said goodbye to Ann and Cliff, and said congratulations one last time before exiting the barn with Jack.

"What a great party," I sighed. Jack wrapped his jacket around me to keep me warm.

"What did Ann tell you when she took you outside?" He asked. I just smiled. Ann told me she wanted to keep it a secret for a little while, and when the time was right, she would announce it publicly. For now, Jack would just have to wait. It was still night, and the sun had not yet risen in the sky, although I knew it was somewhere around four a.m. Jack and I walked hand in hand down the dirt road. We came to a fork in the road, to the right was Jack's farm, and straight ahead was the vineyard.

"Karen… I had such a wonderful night with you... you look so beautiful," he said to me. He leaned in, his lips gently touching mine, and we kissed. Right there under the full moon.

"It is a beautiful night… and I don't want it to end…" I sighed, and he kissed me again, this time more passionately. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me in closer, the kisses becoming longer. I didn't want it to end, but it did, and Jack pulled away.

"Karen… will you come back to my place with me?" he asked, his hand gently stroking my cheek. The words got caught in my throat. I knew what this meant, and I nodded in answer. Jack took my hand and led me to the farm. He led me into the dark farmhouse, gently closing the door, leaving the cold night air behind us.


	9. Numb

**Chapter 9: Numb**

**I**t was morning, and it had happened, although it all seemed so blurry now. Had I been drunk, no I don't think so. All I knew was that I had done it with Jack, and for the first time in a while, I had felt wanted, I had felt loved. It hadn't been my first time, far from it actually. Kai had been my first, that time I will never forget, but from then on in the city, it all spiraled downward, but let's not get into that. It was now morning, maybe even into the afternoon, and the sun showed clearly through the shades.

"Jack," I mumbled, pulling the sheets around me.

"Jack?" I said again. He wasn't next to me, where he had been sleeping not but a few hours ago. I wrapped the blanket around my naked body and stepped onto the cold wooden floor, peeking into the kitchen.

"Jack…" I called out again. He wasn't here. He wasn't anywhere. What the hell was going on? Tears started to form in my eyes, but I sucked them back in, refusing to let this affect me. I was used to being taken advantage of, but for some reason, this time hurt. Last night, when he kissed me, there was something there, and when he touched my arm with his soft hand, it sent waves through my entire body. And then, when he had told me he loved me, I believed him. Now I wish I wouldn't have.

I cringed at my own stupidity, and angrily pulled on my clothes. Not bothering to put on those annoying heels. I stepped out the front door, and slammed it behind me. I must have looked quite stupid with my fancy black dress on in the middle of the day, but I was too angry to care.

As I walked down the dirt road back toward the vineyard, I noticed the mayor's wife running from the forest, a bunch of herbs in her arms. She looked frantic, and her eyes were red as though she had been crying. I was curious.

"Excuse me, but what's wrong?" I asked, trying to be as polite as possible, and not to let my anger show through. She seemed startled.

"It's my daughter, I'm sorry, something terrible has happened, I must go …" she said, tears now spilling from her eyes. Her daughter… Mary. What could have happened? I ran back to the house and quickly changed my clothes, and then ran back to town to find out what was going on. It seemed deserted, and only Lillia stood diligently watering her flowers.

"Lillia, what happened to Mary?" I asked, almost feeling concerned about the girl. Truthfully, I hadn't much liked the girl, but I also never got to know her.

"You haven't heard? Last night she had a miscarriage, and after losing the baby, the mayor says she tried to commit suicide, by slitting her wrists. She's at the midwife's right now, and has to go to the city, as soon as possible. They say she almost died," Lillia said, shaking her head. I couldn't believe it. After bidding Lillia thanks, I ran toward the midwife's house. I ran around the corner, and someone grabbed me by the arm. As I came to a stop I noticed that it was Jack who was holding onto me. I ripped my arm away from him.

"Where the hell did you go this morning? Think you can just do that to me, tell me you love me and then leave!" I screamed at him, starting to walk away. He grabbed my arm and pulled me into a more secluded area.

"Stop it Karen. Don't make a scene, not here, not now. I didn't mean to leave you alone this morning, but I had to go help Mary. Someone told me she had requested to see me, and I couldn't just leave her alone. I'm really sorry. I don't have much time right now so just let me explain everything," he said.

"You don't have much time?" I asked, my head was spinning with confusion.

"I'm going with Mary, to the city," he said.

"What? After what happened last night, you're just… just… going to leave me?" I said, my words were catching in my throat.

"Karen," he said, taking my hand in both of his. "Remember when I told you the baby was Harris'? Well it wasn't, it was mine. I still love her Karen, I don't think I've ever not loved her. Karen I care for you, a lot, and I would _never_ want to hurt you like this, but I have to help Mary, she needs me, more than you do."

I looked at him, right into his eyes, and shook my head in disbelief. I wasn't going to cry. I had cried to much since the day I had returned here, and I wasn't going to let it happen again. As I looked into Jack's eyes, I knew that he was being sincere. Who was I to stop him from being with the one he loved, even if it wasn't me. Mary needed him.

"Just go Jack…" I said, dropping my head toward the dirt. He squeezed my hand, and kissed my cheek. It felt like a sting. He turned and walked the other way. I turned around, and walked back on through town. The wind had now picked up, and I could still hear the commotion down the road.

Now I knew how Kai felt, just being left, alone, losing someone you _thought_ you loved. But I didn't love Jack, the feeling wasn't there. Maybe given more time, I could have grown to love him, but last night, I think I had just felt alone for too long.

I walked back up the road to the vineyard. All of a sudden, I felt tired. It seemed as though my legs would just give out from under me, and my head felt heavy. I opened the door to my house and walked up to my room, and as I pulled the covers from my bed I sighed, letting all the air escape from my body. I lay down under my covers, and closed my eyes. I felt unloved, unwanted, used, and betrayed, all the emotions sweeping through my body. I hated it. All I wanted right now was to not feel anything at all, to be emotionless, not letting anything hurt me. All I wanted was to feel _numb_.


	10. All The Little Things

**Chapter 10: All The Little Things  
**

**A**fter that morning, I didn't leave my room for that entire afternoon and a good part of the next day. I sulked. It was the only way I could find of dealing with my loss. My loss, yet another to add to my list. I didn't get it… I couldn't understand why all this was happening to me.

"Where are you now goddess?" I cried out, thumping my head against the back wall. The tears streamed from my eyes. "Where are you now…?"

As a child, my mother had taken me to church every Sunday. While there I had always been taught that if you believed and relied on the Harvest Goddess, she would help you with whatever you needed. My mother had told me that the Goddess watched over us all, and I believed her. Maybe that was my first mistake, relying on a mythological being for my every need. If I was to survive, I was to do it on my own, even if that meant hiding myself away until I felt like I could survive.

I pulled the covers over my head and closed my eyes, hoping to sleep off this intolerable headache. Maybe if I was lucky I would wake up and find that this had all been a dream, and I would be back in the city. But I knew that couldn't be true, for my heart hurt far too much for this to be a dream… It hurt too much to even be a nightmare.

* * *

"_**L**ook at the moon… have you ever seen it so big?" I asked as I ran my hands up and down my arms. He wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me in closer to him. I lay my head on his chest and looked up to the star filled sky and smiled._

"_No… I can't say I have," he whispered as he knelt his chin on the top of my head, stroking my hair softly as he took my hand in his._

"_Where were you today?" I questioned curiously, looking up into his eyes._

"_I went to the forest and made an offering to the Goddess," he said calmly, still staring at the sky._

"_Why? Most of the villagers only do that in times of distress, hoping that just maybe there is some celestial being that will make all their problems go away…" I sighed. I didn't have much faith in the Goddess, for she never seemed to be able to make these bruises disappear._

"_I prayed. I prayed that your father realize what he is doing, and I prayed that you are able to forgive him. I prayed for the vineyard, that it might possibly bring a good harvest next year. I prayed for you Karen… I prayed for us. I know you've had it tough, I've watched you fall so many times, and it's hard not being able to do anything. But that's why you must," he said, placing a soft kiss upon my lips, holding me tightly in his arms._

"_There's nothing I can do," I replied, dropping my head to the ground. He picked my chin up and looked me right in the eyes and smiled._

"_You can pray Karen. You can believe that everything is going to be alright. You have to have faith. Have faith in me, I want above all else to make you happy. Have faith in us, that we'll make it through all this. Have faith in yourself. Karen, you are like that star," he said, pointing off to the north, at the brightest star in the sky. "The north star Karen, without you, I would be lost."_

_I grinned at him, and placed another kiss on his lips._

"_You know Kai, even though I don't seem to have much faith in the Goddess, I find myself wishing to her for the things I desire. Before you came, when he would hit me, I would hope and pray and wish for a way out. I would wish that she would send me a boat so I could escape from this place, and never look back. I wished that she would save me. And she did… she did save me. But she sent me no boat or ticket to get away. She sent me something far better than that… she sent me you."

* * *

_

"**K**ai…" I whispered. But he was gone. All that was left was the memories of us, memories that would only come to me in my dreams, and haunt me until the day I died. I choked back my tears, and pulled myself out of bed. The sun shone brightly outside, but was only to be masked once again as I pulled the curtains shut.

I walked to my mirror. My eyes were reddened and my skin was pale. I pulled back my hair out of my face. I looked horrible, like a monster that hadn't seen the daylight for years. Maybe today I would go out, just maybe. As I got ready, I felt some energy returning to my body for the first time, and it felt good.

"Karen… it's good to see you. I made eggs, it's not much but I can cook you up some pancakes or sausage if you'd like," my mother said genially as I walked down the stairs into the main room. It was wonderful seeing her happy, and I think she was happy to see me.

"Eggs are fine," I replied seating myself at the table. She placed a plate in front of me, and I meekly picked at the food. I still didn't seem to have much of an appetite.

"Are you alright dear?" my mother asked with a worried look on her face. After not appearing once from my room for nearly two days, I could see why she was worried.

"I'm fine," and for the first time in a while, I actually did feel fine. Not great, but fine. There was a knock at the door. My mother walked from the kitchen, gave me a kiss on the top of me head, and turned to answer the door as I finished off my eggs. After a few quiet mumbling, my mother returned to the kitchen.

"There is someone outside for you," she said quietly with a smile on her face.

"I don't want to talk to anyone, not yet…" I replied, swallowing a sip of water.

"This is no one you will regret seeing dear, just go out and talk to him," she said looking out the kitchen window. Him… I wanted nothing to do with a boy right now, but I trusted my mother. I grabbed my winter jacket and headed out the front door.

Outside there was boy my age, with golden brown hair and a fuzzy fleece jacket staring at the ground.

"Cliff?" I questioned, a smile appearing on my face. My mother was right, this was someone I would not regret seeing. I loved Cliff with all my heart, and for a cousin that lived so close, I felt like I hadn't seen him in forever. He looked up from the ground and took a nervous step forward.

"Hey Karen," he said, kicking up some dirt with his foot. I still stood on the front porch, looking down at the nervous boy with a funny expression on my face.

"What's the matter? Can't even talk to your own cousin now?" I laughed. I walked up to him and hugged him. He returned the embrace and smiled.

"I haven't seen you in a while Karen. Well… I saw you at Ann's little surprise party, but I haven't really talked to you since you left the first time. How are things?" He asked, with a genuine look of concern on his face.

"They're hard… but getting better," I replied.

"That's good to hear. Hey Karen, would you mind just talking a walk with me, I need to talk to someone. I know this is out of the blue, and probably a bad time but…"

"It's fine, let's go," I replied, and we started a walk down the vineyard path towards the forest.

"Now what's on your mind?"

"It's just Ann, no not really Ann, I have no problem with Ann… it's just the whole thing. Getting married… being a dad! It's a lot to handle at one time, you know?"

"No I wouldn't know actually. But don't worry so much about it. I mean, I know it's going to be a big change for you, and I'm sure the fact you are going to be a dad is scary, but Cliff, you will be an amazing dad. And Ann loves you so much, you two will be perfect."

We continued to walk through the forest, by the carpenter's house, and up into the springs. We talked about life while I was gone, and the future, and how things have changed for better and for worse. It was nice having someone to talk to, especially someone neutral and loving like my cousin. He had always been level headed, maybe from spending his whole life fending for himself. Even after his aunt, my mother, had offered him a home to live in when he wandered to Flowerbud, he chose to stay out and live on his own, and I admired him for it. He was strong, and I could learn from him. The sun was slowly setting in the west, but I felt like there was something I still needed to finish before the day ended.

"Cliff, will you do me a favor?" I asked him. He nodded his head.

"I'd do anything for you, you've helped me so much today, thank you." He said smiling, taking my hands in his.

"Will you come pray with me… to the Harvest Goddess?" I asked meekly.

"I thought you didn't believe…" he said.

"I didn't think I did either… but there's nothing else I can do," I replied.

"Of course I will come." We walked past the carpenter's house and seated ourselves in the back forest, just over the bridge. It was beautiful here as the fireflies started to come out from hiding, and the moon came up in the night sky. It was the same place I had seen in my dream… the dream that hurt so much to remember, but showed me something that I would have never thought of on my own. Cliff and I sat in silence… and I prayed, and Cliff stayed with me. Even as the tears started to spill from my eyes, he held me and comforted me, and when it was time to go home, he led me back.

"Thank you so much Cliff, for coming with me and keeping me company, I'm really lucky to have a cousin like you, and Ann is lucky to have you as a husband," I smiled. We said our goodbyes, and I pulled open the door to my home.

"You're just in time for dinner." My mother said as she lit a candle on the table. It smelled delicious. As I seated myself at the table, and said grace, I realized that I still had something to be thankful for. I had Cliff, my cousin, and my mother. I had my family.


	11. The First Snow

**Chapter 11: The First Snow**

**T**oday was the Tenth of Winter, better known as the Thanksgiving festival, the day in which all the girls give a small gift to the ones they love, a sweet token to show how much we have to be thankful for. It is a day of chocolate cakes, and fudge, but more importantly it is a day of togetherness.

But I was feeling lonelier than ever. My mother had taken a trip to the city to do some winter shopping, and I was left all alone in the empty house. Throughout the day I found myself cooking, obviously for no reason since I had no one in this village to give my gifts. I sat in the kitchen watching the moist chocolate cakes rise in the oven, and then soon burn to a crisp as I realized I was a horrible baker. I didn't cake though. I made cookies, and fudge, and éclairs, each one seeming to fail miserably.

"I guess I'm lucky I don't have to make anything for anyone… I don't think they would enjoy it very much," I said to myself as I dropped a batch or mushy cookies into the garbage can. I couldn't stand being indoors anymore. I looked out the window, and saw the sun slowly setting over the trees. I figured this moment would be the perfect time for a walk.

I grabbed my coat and walked out the door, the winter breeze hitting my face like ice. It had not yet snowed, but you could tell it was winter by the way the frost clung to the dead leaves. All the stores were closed today, so my only choice was the beach, a place that I had gone many times as a girl. I walked past Jack's farm, cringing as I even thought of him. I continued past Green Ranch, and started my way down the dunes.

As I walked onto the beach, I saw someone that I had never expected to see. I walked down the steps cautiously, keeping my eyes only on him. He sat alone at the end of the dock, his bare feet swinging over the edge, staring sullenly into the waters. The sun had now completely set over the horizon, and all that was left was dark purple clouds.

As I tiptoed across the beach, he turned his head to look at me. He looked deep into my eyes it seemed, but then dropped his head, and turned again towards the dark waters.

"I'm sorry… I don't want to bother you," I said quietly, and turned back.

"No…" A soft voice replied. "Don't leave... I mean, you don't have to go." I walked back towards him slowly, watching him carefully in his movements. He was fiddling with something in-between his fingers, but still kept his gaze focused on the water. At times, I thought he was going to jump. I stayed standing, for I was sure he didn't want me here.

"What are you doing here?" I asked smoothly, crossing my arms for warmth. It was fairly warm for winter, but the sea breeze sent chills through my body. Kai moved over on the edge of the dock, so I sat down next to him, mirroring his ways as a dangled my feet over the sweeping waters.

"She just left… The ferry cast off about an hour ago," He mumbled. I sighed, I wanted to comfort him, I wanted to hold him and tell him that everything was going to be all right, because that's what the old Karen would have done. But I couldn't do that anymore, and I knew that there was nothing I could say that would help.

"I'm sorry…" was the best I could manage.

"You know..." he continued, "I've been coming here a lot, to think mostly. I guess I figured that maybe one day while I sat here on the beach, the ferry would come back, and you would be coming with it."

I wanted to cry, because of all the pain I had caused him. I wanted to defend my actions of leaving to the city, but I wanted to tell him that everything was all my fault at the same time. I didn't know what I could do, what I could say, all I knew is that I wanted to make things better… but I couldn't.

"I'm sorry…" Was that truly all I could manage? I weak I'm sorry. The silence between us killed, but I knew talking might hurt even worse. I looked down to the object he was twirling in his finger. It was a ring. A beautiful one at that, with a shimmering diamond entangled in a thin strand of gold.

"What is that?" I asked curiously.

"It was Popuri's engagement ring," he said.

"But what about the blue feather?" I asked. The blue feather was a tradition here in flowerbud village, a symbol of engagement just like the diamond ring was in the city. As a girl I had always dreamt of receiving one of my own, and as I grew older, I knew that I wanted it to be from Kai.

"Popuri didn't want an old feather," he half chuckled to himself, "she wanted a ring, a diamond that would last forever. So, I got her one, and look where it gets me. I went all the way to the city to buy this little thing, and here I am sitting on the dock…"

"You were in the city? Why… why didn't you come to find me?"

"I had let you go. I was there shopping for the girl I thought I loved; I wasn't there to find the girl I was once in love with. Plus, after all that time, I figured you just didn't want to be found. But I was there Karen. I was at your apartment, standing outside… but I just couldn't bring myself to walk inside. So instead, I found the most prestigious jewelry store I could find, to purchase this…" He squeezed the ring tightly between his fingers.

"This little ring…" he whispered, "containing so many feelings and so much meaning… and so much heartbreak…" I watched him carefully as he let the ring slip from his palm and land gracefully in the dark waters, it's golden shimmer slowly disappearing as it sank. I looked over to face him, only to see him crying.

Without thinking, I placed my hand on top of his. He picked up his head and looked at me, the tears seeming to stop, and then looked back down at the water.

"What about you?" he asked, "Why are you here?"

I questioned whether I was really going to spill out my entire problem, right here; to the boy I was in love with, when he himself was in so much pain.

"You wouldn't want to hear my story," I mumbled.

"Try me." And so I told him. I told him of how me and Jack started out, and of how I seemed to gain this false hope, only to have it crushed once again. I cried yes, I didn't want to, but I did.

"I'm sure I got what I deserved…" I said under my breath. Kai looked up at me, and wiped the tears from my face. His hand felt warm on my cheek.

"No one deserves that."

"I do. After what I did to my family and the vineyard. After what I did to you… I deserved exactly what I got. And what do I have left from it all… nothing."

"Karen, just because you hurt me, that doesn't mean I would ever want anything or anyone to hurt you. And you do have something, something you never lost in the first place." He picked up my chin and looked right into my eyes, and kissed me. Suddenly, all the cold winter air around me seemed to disappear, and all I could feel was warmth. He placed his hand on my cheek, and placed another soft deep kiss on my lips.

Before I knew it, we had left the dock, and moved onto the beach, his lips not once leaving mine. The sand was cold and smooth under my feet, but as he pulled me in closer to him, I could no longer feel the cold. Around us, small snow flakes began to fall. I collapsed onto the ground, laughing as the snow flakes melted on my face. Kai leaned over me, kissing my neck.

"Kai… I love you. I'm sorry, I never wanted to leave you, I shouldn't have, it was a bad idea. I should have stayed here with you and… and…I love you Kai, please don't leave me, please don't let me get hurt again," I cried, tears spilling from my eyes again.

"I won't ever leave you, I won't ever hurt you, and I will _always_ love you."


End file.
